Saturday, March 5, 2011

Confessions of a confused mind...

Life is not easy i have realised this hard fact in my small little life of 25 years. But one has to make it beautiful and worth living. I have seen many people who make their lives appear to be very gorgeous...but only from outside. When you get a chance to sneek peak into their oh-so-wanna-be lives...you will find it stagnant and rotten. Iam confused in my mind what life i want....obviously the answer would be the former one! 

So,..here is my constant pursuit to get a best out of my life...but HOW?? Iam a university student right now with loads of bright ideas and dreams in mind...but will they get fulfilled? How can i expect my days to be smooth and tension free after university days? How will i get a good job...a dream job? a job which can show me some bank balance at the end of month?? a job where i do not return home tired...where there is no politics...one which does not hurt my ego...Why the hell iam expecting all this...when i know that there is no miracle waiting outside.

As the ending days are approaching...i feel like hiding to some place where these days do not end..everything comes to eternity for i don't want to face those cruel moments which i have aleready witnessed. But that is not possible. Life is no cherry on a cake! One has to face the music if you want to sale on high tides...you have to bear those brunts to get a scar free future. Anyways now when i realise that i cannot escape from this reality comes another big question...WHAT KIND OF LIFE I WANT??

This is something which keeps on haunting my days and nights. How do i want to live? Like a super successful professional woman who has her shares (actually MORE) of frustrations in her personal life or like a perfect indian sati-savitri types bahu...who is always under pressures to prove her abilities and has to look to her husband for every single thing she has to buy...what do i want? Something in between..a part of each!..well that is something every girl wants..but then do they get it? Do they get satisfactions and peace in life? If yes...then how do they do it? How do they strike such a BALANCE?

Having seen the hoities of media world...i find it something difficult to do. You have to sacrifice either of the one. But do i want that? Do i want to remain single till 35? NO! Do i want a life of housewife after acquring MA's and PG's in mass comm? CERTAINLY NOT! The life that i demand for myself is not an easy one. GOD HELP ME!!I want to run in every direction. I want THIS and i want THAT too. I want name, fame and privacy at the same time. I want to rule the world but i want to live and nurture my small little world also. HOW WILL THIS HAPPEN?

I want several answers from life..i have many questions from life. Who will answer these question? Yeah...i know i have to search them myself.  I think i need to sit back and make a list of priorities in life...what i can achieve and what is out of my limits. I need to make realistic goals for myself else my mind will go haywire and i will burst myslelf. SWOT ANAYLSYIS is need of an hour....

Image Source: Google Images

2 comments:

  1. Yes, most people are superficial and so are we all in some way or the other! But this is what life is about? Pretense, confusion, cluelessness, etc?

    Am 27 now, and I've just lived for the moment usually and some think I am wasting it; but for me every second is so much worth of living! Fine, I may do a SWOT here as well! :p

    And as Mr. Bean asked me to, I left a comment and will follow too! Ohh yes, I may hunt you down on fb too now! :D

    Take care, and let life just be :)

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